My Little Dark Secret...

I went to a girl's night a couple of nights ago at a restaurant and when it came time to pay I pulled out my wallet and felt the piercing eyes and heard the audible gasps of everyone at the table. Before I could make up some lame excuse and say something like, "Hey, who stole my purse and put this sloppy, disorganized one in its place?!" or "Boy, you guys should have seen the shopping I took part in today!!" and last but not least, "Man alive! David must be playing one heck of a joke on me! Would you look at all the receipts and trash he shoved in here?!!" Nope. I had nothing. I tried to sheepishly shove it back into my purse but someone had to say something.

See, I have this little problem called being a "receipt hoarder". My wallet looks like I am ready to be audited at any moment. Heaven help us if I can't return something six months after I bought it!! That would just be the end of "my take back because I spent way too much and yes, it really doesn't look as good as it did in the dressing room mirror" returns. Not pretty and really unnerving for my little world as we all know it around here.

Here is my seemingly unassuming purse. A purse that I might add, used to be a beautiful, exotic, Italian leather purse that cost way too much money but after two years and three kids...not so beautiful anymore nor exotic. This is the inside of my purse. This is the creature that resides in my purse.
This afternoon the "creature" received a makeover.
The shredder was treating.
Best finds from the clean out of 2008? A dollar, a Starbucks gift card (still with some money) and two rain checks for the dollar theater.
The oldest receipt in my wallet? A Wal-Mart receipt dating back to 9/29/07. But look!! Lo and behold my wallet actually snaps shut now. What a great thing.


I have to now go eat an entire tube of Pringles because I am about to have a panic attack because I know I threw a receipt away that I will now desperately need.